July 31, 2003
i have a confession to make: it was i who invented kissing. it was about 800 years ago, if i'm not mistaken, the 13th century. before that, people didn't kiss, at all. all they did was walk with their eyes fixed ahead of them. they even greeted one another that way, without so much of a turn of the head, or a smile. being a people of such rigidity, one can only imagine the sex at that time. understandable, everyone had an insatiated look on their faces. but they never showed this with a scowl or a frown. but they were well-meaning in everything they did. they helped neighbours burn down corridor-plants that were growing out of control, killed stray cats that scratched any of their neighbours' doors (or their own door for that matter) and broke the arms of stealing little children for the baker. and so life went on in the 13th century like this, all over the world. everything was well in order, but something was amiss. i was just a little boy then. i think i was 8. my family were slaves to a rich man, who owned a chocolate factory, which made chocolates that tasted of salty rubber. but everyone loved them, because they were the only chocolates available. they were green in colour, and took hours to melt- even in the mouth. this prompted many people of the new age to come up with 'chewing gum', i can imagine. but i digress. there was a girl. she belonged to a family of muggers, the highest caste at that time. however due to a widely publicised dispute with the king of the Greater South they were banished to living on the streets. all their wealth had been donated to all the virgins by means of a secret mailing service. rumour had it this service was owned by the rich chocolate man as well. being muggers, they had certain abilities which no one else had. they could tilt their heads both left and right, whereas many could only tilt their heads in one direction. this, of course, was of no great concern for the people who never looked anywhere but in front of them. this head-tilting function was merely a luxury for when they were sleeping and accidentally shifted to one side. the muggers however made full use of their head-tilting gifts. they had a wider scope of the world at that time, and were able to sneak up on their victims without ever being noticed. for anyone who could actually observe them were muggers themselves, and deemed it perfectly fine to mug unsuspecting commoners. in this way, the muggers, with their head-tilting specialties, made a sweet, financially-abounding living for themselves and were the envy of many. politicians never failed to make it their top priorities to become acquainted with prominent Muggers and, more often than not, usually ended up being mugged themselves. they never realised this, naturally. the girl- she must have been 8 as well, give and take at most, a couple of years. she had long grey hair which reached the small of her back. i knew this because she was naked wherever she went. and so was i. the only people who ever wore clothes then were the Preachers of Humility and Properness. these were a small group of people who wore a great many layers of clothes; and a tie over the final layer, whatever the final layer may have been. there was one time a Preacher had worn a singlet over his sweater as a final layer, and also had a tie on above his singlet. everyone who saw him almost-smiled at him, but he thought he looked especially dashing, without really showing it on his face. while i had a full head of thick black hair and was actually quite fond of it, i had always admired the girl with long grey hair. i could tilt my head both ways as well. nobody ever found out, because i was only permitted to look ahead in crowded places. one time i was alone, scrubbing the garden dirt clean, and i saw the girl with long grey hair. she was sitting on a rock not too far away. i looked up to my left to get a good look at her. she looked straight ahead at me. behind her was a stream of people weaving in and out of themselves, maintaining a sort of dead-set manner about their movements. they looked like a lot of boxes being pushed forward. but at that moment, she got up and my eyes shot back at her. then, in the most graceful manner i had ever seen anybody walk, she swanned towards me, like a young angel. she had no breasts, but she still emanated a kind of softness that one could only associate with feminity. i fell in love with her instantly. she walked towards the garden and stopped at the hilt.
'do you play?' said she.
'play?' said i.
'come.'
and so she grabbed me by the hand and led me away from the garden. i had not a clue as to where we were going. i couldn't even guess, because i had never gone beyond the garden where i worked. everyday while scrubbing the dirty grass (i was told to keep scrubbing till they sparkled) i would look out to the distance. but there were so many people walking about, i assumed the entire country must have been like that, with people obscuring anything of a view. but this girl was taking me somewhere with not so many people, i was slowly beginning to realise, because with every hundred or so steps we took, i began to see more and more land unoccupied by men and women. initially i thought she was taking me to a place full of green-coloured people, or perhaps the place where the rich chocolate man got all his chocolate stuff. because i could only see green. after we got to where she wanted to take me in the first place, we sat down on grass. i was unnerved by the fact that there was absolutely nobody around us. after a while, i started to appreciate it, and wished that life could be like this all the time. i watched her as she sweeped all her tresses with both hands and clutched it, before slowly tying it into a knot. they were intricate hand movements, and i was not able to follow what she was doing, but i was satisfied enough with the end-product: her hair was neatly sitting on her head in a bun, the bright sun gleaming healthily on it. a single trail of hair fell in front of her face, and i noticed that it was not grey, but black. jet black, just like my own. i suddenly became very puzzled, and decided to lean forward. i was inches away from her, and we could do nothing but stare at each other. i, hopelessly deeper in love; she, beautifully uncaring.
'do you like my hair?' she asked.
and then it happened. i did, so i leant further forward till there was nothing left to do, but press our faces together. we were both breathing very hard by now, and the motion of our jerking heads pressed our lips together intermittently. until in one tremendous pulsating moment, we kissed. we didn't know what it was, but we kept doing it. i only realised how happy it made me, when i saw her smile. i reached around her, and undid her hair so that it fell clumsily over both of us. it became dark almost too soon, and we both made our way back home.
the next day, things began to change. people were smiling more carelessly and openly, and even dared tilt their heads to one side to greet fellow passers-by. being 8 and highly observant, i was startled by all the changes. just for a moment, i thought all this was my fault. but i never knew why. just after i heard someone say hello and walk quickly away, i saw her again. she was still naked, and i could see faint grass stains on her sides. as if we had both meant it, we rushed towards each other and grabbed each other by the arms. then kissed again. for the first time as anyone can recall, the entire town turned from looking straight ahead to look at two people who had absolutely nothing to do with them. first they smiled. then, as we started kissing more passionately, started laughing gently. after some time, people started grabbing each other by the arms, and pulled them closer. by the time we were lost in our own world of tongues, saliva, heat and sweat, everyone around us had begun to do the same. boys and girls, girls and men, women and women, women and men. for several hours, the entire city was at a standstill; doing nothing but kissing. she and i broke our love-stance and walked away from each other. the others did the same. then everything was back to usual, only the people looked happier. the next day, people started to walk out in pairs. a few were holding hands (but it looked funny because they had their elbows bent back as they did this). there was an audible chatter in the air for the first time in many, many years. children were seen tilting their heads as they walked, with their parents next to them softly smiling approvingly, but too embarrassed to tilt their heads themselves. the older generation had camped outside their front doors, cursing dryly at the shameless youth of today, gaze fixed straighter ahead than anyone else. it was during this transcient period that i felt most comfortable going out to look for my girlfriend. however i was unable to find her anymore. i wanted to ask around, but it would have been difficult considering none of us had names. and when i did try asking a passer-by by describing her to him or her, they'd brush me aside saying they were in a hurry. the more helpful ones would tell me i was crazy, and that no young girl they'd ever seen had grey hair. eventually, the town became a very amorous one, while i had been spiralling out of love. every single day, when i was scrubbing the gardens, i'd look up to my left, and picture her sitting on the rock, motioning me toward her. after several weeks, i was resigned to having lost my girlfriend. i was miserable for a very long time, and tried finding other girls to kiss. but none of them made me feel like i did when i was kissing her. slowly, i made my way out of the social boundaries of that gregarious town. the town looked so blithe and jocund i was certain that nobody had missed me. just as i was wallowing gloomily in self-pity and loveless capacity, i saw her. she had beautiful black hair and it was slightly longer than i had remembered it to be. she turned pink in the face at the sight of me. i noticed that she had started growing breasts, and was now even more beautiful than before. the flimsy membrane that had been protecting me from being in love gave way at once, and i choked. she walked towards me. my heart started beating wildly, but only for a short while. from a distance, she leant forward and kissed me a dry kiss. then backed off as quickly as she had made me fall in love all over again.
'i have to go.' said she.
'ok.' said i.
but i had no idea where she had to go. i saw her again 800 years later. she still had her long black hair, and i had my full head of thick hair. and we did kiss, for one last time.
10:11 PM
